Caℓamity's Paragoɳ . longdream

[aero ❥]

It was a sequin, a network of caves and corridors. Inside was dark, damp, and gloomy even for Longshadow's standards. Sure, beauty could be found if you looked hard enough; the formations of rock, tiny water falls, the sparkling of crystals. But those little things were tangled within the timeless maze. To someone like the lanky black tom, this was more than a cave. It was an idol, a representation of the Journey. He wasn't spiritual, or religious in the least...but he had a feeling the rest of their journey would be full of confusing and perilous twists and turns with few beauties hidden in between. But the black cat did not fear any of these dangers, and he did not care where the clans settled as long as they separated again. The only thing he had on his mind were his own problems - no matter how selfish that all seemed. By nature he was concerned with mainly himself, and second what affected his well-being. As of late, nothing about that had changed except his first priority. Which of course was not himself, but who he loved. Maybe that made him not so selfish after all.
No...he was still pretty selfish.

Last time he had checked it was afternoon, but sitting in Tempestclan's main cavern he saw through the cracks in the tall ceiling blood-red light. It was sunset. A tiny, insolent pile of mice and even some lizards - one sparrow - served as the fresh-kill. The reptiles were everywhere in the crevices around the cave mouths, and fairly easy to catch. Of course, most of them were small and tough to eat unless you liked trying to gnaw through scales. Longshadow had refused to even touch them, devouring a few mice along the travel to the mountains and pouncing on an extremely young hare when they first arrived, which had been earlier that day. All of the food had given him a new physical life; his jet black pelt once again was able to shine, his clover eyes were lively and his strength was returning in rapid leaps and bounds. He was wiry, so he would never have the brawn of most of his clan mates, but he was still strong enough to keep up with them. The warrior drew a paw up to lick and slide over his face to clean any grime or dust that collected there. That was another thing - these caves certainly were not cleanly. The floor he sat on was hard stone covered with a thin layer of sand and dirt, in places even bat droppings. Disgusting.

A snarl echoed from somewhere in the chain of darkness that led to places he himself had not explored, probably cats fighting over a nesting spot or the like. His clover eyes peered through the pallid expanse, watchful and observant as ever. There were small boulders scattered in patches all round and against the jagged walls, leaving sheltered spaces for cats to rest and sleep. Groups of felines were around those places, others sharing tongues by the fresh-kill pile. Everyone seemed to be bounding together in these hard times, but in a way more alone than they had ever been. Twitching his whiskers, the lengthy tom stretched, back bowing with a curl of his long tail. His unsheathed claws dug into the light earth to scratch solid rock, retracting when he padded away towards a curious opening behind an almost black boulder. Gingerly he stepped in, realizing it was a sort of tunnel. For a human, it would have been impossible to enter, therefore leaving it's contents unseen and classified as unimportant. But for a cat, it was more than accessible. He had to crouch, but slipped inside with his tail the last thing to disappear into the apparent darkness. It felt a little catastrophic, and even when he emerged to the other side the space wasn't the largest. About the size of a ten by ten room. What made it airy was the hole broken into the roof, bright light spilling down to the clearing that dazzled his eyes. Blinking away the sudden shock, Longshadow gazed upon the far wall of the 'secret' cave. It was smooth, with almost straight lines running across it. Each was a different shade of brown, red, grey, or blue. The tomcat didn't have a clue, but they were layers of rock that had been worn away by water that had once flooded this place probably a million years ago. His eyes followed them up, entire body recoiling as he noticed figures hanging from the ceiling. Bats. They stayed away from the hole, clinging to the darkest reaches of the more or less twelve foot top. His momentary wonder had somehow shielded his nose from their strange stench, but now it was all too clear. It stung his eyes and made it hard to breathe, the musk odor choking him. Deep, lung wrenching coughs echoed around him - filling the silent space with chaotic noise. It was loud, too loud but he couldn't control the itch in his throat any longer.

Feet scrambling, the warrior tried to back track the way he had come but ended up tail-first in a rough rock wall. What the hell is going on, It was some sort of reaction he was having, it must have been. His clover orbs were blurry and watering, and it was horribly difficult to breathe. Managing to spin around, the black tom finally found the tunnel back, but stole a look at the smooth colorful layers before he turned tail. Shapes were moving across them...soaring...the bats had been startled. Clawing his way to freedom and fresh air, Longshadow half leaped, half scurried over the black boulder and collapsed on the ground, gulping down air that wasn't trying to kill him. Shaking his head, he pulled himself into a sitting position, breathing pattern slowly returning to normal. Note to fucking self: Never go in strange tunnels. You'll go batshit crazy.

[Dawn]

"I love him so much it just turns to hate. I fake it so real, I am beyond fake. "

[/sup]

Dreamfeather's head jerked left, feeling cool rock brush at her shoulders on both sides. Then, ever so slowly, she cocked her head right, ears rotating and finally pointing at angles, listening intently. She stretched out her tail and slapped the surrounding wall with it, hearing a very soft thump echo throughout. Slowly but surely she pulled herself from the little tunnel, and stood freely, grinning in spite of herself as she sneezed. She'd been poking around the musky interior of the caverns all evening- sure, she was "checking for anything dangerous," but really she was just exploring, satiating her curiosity. Dreamfeather might have been the deputy of Tempestclan, and an experienced warrior of forty five moons, but she was still young at heart. The events of lately had worn on her playfulness, but she was slowly regaining it with the newness of travelling. Most of her clan mates were grumbling and snarling about the move. Truly, she missed her homeland. But she was no fish out of water on this journey; she adapted easily. There was no time to stop and doubt; all they could do was press on ahead, and that was just what she was doing.

Dreamfeather crouched atop a little ledge jutting out from the rock, barely three fox lengths from the ground. It felt empowering to be elevated above the empty cavern, and exhilaration filled her sense of claustrophobia. She'd only just thought of it, because she had been so enthused in her 'duties,' but she needn't explore alone... Dropping to the floor, she began to move along with her nose down, and did so for a very long time, only stopping to acknowledge a Vertigoclan warrior with a friendly greeting in reply. When she did pick up the scent trail, it led her in a crazy, meandering path, but she hardly noticed. It was all quiet, then loud, cats at her sides and then none; she was focused on her nose. For a moment, she paused. What am I going to say to him? But then she caught a fresh whiff on a cold breeze, drifting in from some little slit in the wall and she was absorbed again.

The caverns were empty and Dreamfeather raced on, coming to a halt as she was met with a rocky patch of caves. A sharp stone pricked at her paw pads, and she nearly missed the black shape that lay against the face of a boulder ahead. She breathed deeply through her nose, feeling childish as her throat constricted. Dreamfeather called out, expecting her voice to crack, "Longshadow!" Instead it was crystal clear, high and strong as she continued, "I wasn't sure where- well, never mind." The bengal smiled blissfully, blinking in the patches of gloom as she approached. Her gait was self-assured and slow, slinking along with glowing blue eyes checking for danger. "I wanted to talk to you. I figured you would be scoping things out, too, so... maybe I could join you?" It seemed strange to be seeing him here, and speaking so calmly, and looking into his clover green eyes. After everything that had come to pass, she wondered if he would even speak to her. Perhaps it was better, easier, if they split apart. But she still wanted to try. Dreamfeather couldn't help herself, she wanted to pursue the impossible. "If you want me, anyway."

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[aero ❥]

Licking his paw once again he drew it across his face, rubbing away some dust he had kicked up back in the bat cave. Longshadow had his mind made up: the sooner the clans moved on, the better. His bad experienced had left a bad taste of the entire area in his mouth...literally. The black tom almost blended into the boulder and the shadow cast by it, she couldn't be blamed for almost missing him. For once unaware of his surroundings by cleaning himself the silver Bengal took his presence by force of surprise. She was the last cat he expected to come across. The warrior was sure his luck was much worse off, he had been preparing for Voidstar to corner him in a crevice and try to beat the life out of him. This alternative was much better. He was clearly startled, timidly sitting up properly and blinking in hello. Even in the dim light her eyes were radiant, the vibrant blue as dazzling as the shaft of light back in the bat cave. It had been a long time, too long since they'd been this close. She had been so busy the lonely tomcat had only caught glimpses of his beloved - now she was standing in front of him in full view.

"Longshadow!" Transparent and crystal, the dark cat's ears perked at his name. She wanted to see him! Well, she must if she was making sure she had his attention. He relived the first time she had said his name by the stream back in the fen, moon high above them. She had whispered it - he had barely heard. But it had passed her lips, and like that first time and every time since she called him his heart lifted. Though a thought not as illuminated entered his mind. The fen is gone. Tempestclan territory is gone. I can never revisit those living memories. The lanky male gave a soft shake of the head. She is my living memory now. "I wasn't sure where- well, never mind." Everything inside him froze as Dreamfeather crept closer, elegantly checking to make sure the cost was clear. Or however that saying went. Standing now, Longshadow dipped his head in a proper greeting. He was truly baffled by her smile. So beautiful, so perfect upon her face he couldn't remember the last time he had seen it - but he didn't want it to leave. "I wanted to talk to you. I figured you would be scoping things out, too, so... maybe I could join you?" "Scoping things out is an understatement," He grumbled, thinking back to the painful terror he had just experienced. But the warrior was more ecstatic over her proposition. She wanted to spend time with him. Of course, his statue like expression and outside didn't communicate what was going on inside - just his clover eyes sparkled. "If you want me, anyway." Her last words he took so many ways. They had so many meanings she probably would never comprehend. Was she asking for forgiveness? A chance? Offering him one? Whatever it meant, deeper meaning or not, yes. Yes. Of course he wanted her. He met eyes with the deputy, inhaling. He trapped the stale and still musk air inside his lungs until they felt about to burst, when he let a big whooosh out. "I'll always want you." His tone was so sincere, so smooth the truth flowed from him like water on silk. She could take that any way she wanted, all versions and possibilities were honest. But reflecting, his reply seemed a little boyish and silly, and his black fur grew hot. "Well, ughm," The lanky tomcat searched for something to say. "Let's carry on, shall we?"

He led the way in the opposite direction of the bat cave, not wanting to have to explain his reluctance to go in. Instead he slipped between two cone-like rocks sticking up from the ground, strolling carefully over mineral deposits. A steady drip from what seemed every rock began, wetting the now slick rock floor and making his short fur bristle. Obviously she wants to talk, so slow down. He told himself, easing his pace to drop back beside her. His long legs stretched, gaining ground with ease. I'll let her start the..talking. He decided silently, still just thrilled to be in her presence. He wanted to ask so many questions, but most of them were related to uncomfortable subjects he definitely did not want to reel to the surface.

[Dawn]

"I love him so much it just turns to hate. I fake it so real, I am beyond fake. "

[/sup]

As always, Longshadow was silent as she drew nearer. But then he broke the tenseness, seeming like the same tom she'd always known, with his words "Scoping things out is an understatement," She wondered at his tone, what had happened before she arrived, and wanted to ask. But would she get a straight answer out of him? Was it worth the risk to pursue the topic? "I'll always want you." Dreamfeather froze, looking at him, about a fox length from her destination at his side. Her smile half faltered. Was she guilty of playing with his heart? She had never really considered it, because she had never entertained the thought that she could ever take a mate. The only tom in the clan she would be allowed to have kits with was Voidstar. Had she been toying with him, too, leading him on? I loved, and love, them both, she admitted to herself. But for different reasons. In different ways. If I've hurt them, it wasn't intentionally.

She'd left him hanging on that, and he seemed mildly embarrassed. Me too, Dreamfeather wanted to reply, even as he was speaking again. I'll always want you, even when I was with the leader I wanted you. "Let's carry on, shall we?" The deputy nodded. "Yeah." He started out moving quickly. She knew that she could meet him if she upped her speed, but instead chose to wait for him to walk beside her. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, Longshadow." That seemed like a safe place to start. Or should she have led up to that? No. It was inevitable. He deserved her apology. But she also deserved his. "You were gone, and I was confused, and Voidstar was there- I don't belong to anyone. I'm the deputy of this clan, and I have to take care of my duties and watch Voidstar's back. He doesn't love me like I love you, like I love him. It's different. And I do, love you. I choose you, over him." Dreamfeather sighed, shaking her head. "Am I making any sense? I'm sure that I'm not." She turned her head back and studied the high, cavernous ceiling above them. Eloquence failed her yet again. "I must sound like such an idiot..." she muttered, not looking at him.


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[aero ❥]

Like old times, he found his eyes tracing her swirling, striped pelt. Were the black the stripes, or the silver? The lanky tom asked many silly questions, but just as many serious ones about the elegant femme. She hadn't changed a bit - on the outside. On the inside, well, he would soon find out. She wasn't just a study now, she was a life. A way of life. She was so close he didn't miss a beat as her tiny smile broke. The warrior wished with all of his heart to know what thoughts raced through the deputy's head. He'd given anything to read her mind from day one. But he wasn't and would never be graced with such miraculous powers; if he had the ability, would he find out not knowing was so much better? No. I'd want the truth - I'm done with lies. As he padded along after dropping beside her, his height shortened to meet her's by slouching slightly. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, Longshadow." The black cat's clover eyes darted to her face, but this time not searching for detail. He searched for meaning.

"You were gone, and I was confused, and Voidstar was there- I don't belong to anyone. I'm the deputy of this clan, and I have to take care of my duties and watch Voidstar's back. He doesn't love me like I love you, like I love him. It's different. And I do, love you. I choose you, over him." His eyes wavered to the ground, back slightly damp from falling droplets. Longshadow shook himself, trying to shake the feeling of surprise and water's chill. She loves me. It was reassuring, glorious. His ears had never caught something better. At the lake that distant day moons ago he had doubted if Dreamfeather truly loved him. If he could trust her claimed feelings and emotions. But why would she lie, here, alone, with no one to impress or be wary of except himself. But she also loves Voidstar, His conscious brought up a valid point. Would her divided loyalty (Split in three by not only the two toms but the clan.) make any difference in their...blossoming...relationship? The tom wouldn't know. He'd never loved before this. Before her. She chose him, but what did that all truly entail? "Am I making any sense? I'm sure that I'm not." The warrior looked back up at his adventure partner, expressionless face forming a half smile of his own. "I must sound like such an idiot..."

"I understand for the most part. I can't say I would have made the same decisions as you, but we're different cats. Everyone does what they need to do." Longshadow's voice was monotone, not angry or thrilled. His pace slowed until his long legs stopped walking completely. "You don't sound like an idiot. I accept your apology. I apologized at the lake, but I'll say it again. Dreamfeather I'm sorry I abandoned you. That I left you alone. And that I made the decision of - him - or me harder than it needed to be. You know I love you, that wont change. More than anything I want your happiness, not your affection." His eyes reflected her in the dim light. "But, I must sound like such an idiot." For the warrior, it was the closest thing to humor he could muster. He said his smart comment smoothly, almost in a breathless manner. But fixing his posture to stand erect, the lanky male did manage a smirk.