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Post by MiNTY♥ on Jun 10, 2012 5:39:51 GMT -5
Green eyes, blue skies, natural distasters when she cries Constantly she was being dragged down, her belly tugging on her every move. Looking up she scented all the cats and heard them up ahead and stopped. She knew most of her clan had already fled here for refuge, their only council being Fawndance. Hauntedsky had waddled on after them all wanting to take her time just in case she hurt the kits. Everything was a disaster, how on earth was she supposed to raise her kits in this? Lowering herself to the ground she tucked her paws underneath her and half closed her eyes. Without a reliable source of prey and having to move about all her time she did not know how her kits would have a place to survive. She was scared that she would lose them or that they would be stillborn if she moved around too much, and if she was not able to eat enough then how were her kits supposed to be born healthy? If they were born with deformities then they would be even harder to look after and everyone would be getting in the way pushing her levels of stress to the extreme. She just wanted to care for her babies.
As if that was not enough she was also lying about who the father was. That all went very well until the day she would run into Tidalhaunt during the journey because there was no doubting he would be here somewhere. Even if she did her best to avoid him he would still hear the news that she was expecting kits from another cat, gossip speeded very quickly especially when there were many cats in a small space. He was bound to get mad at her, think that she had betrayed him as Jaggedmoon’s name was tossed around. No, she was simply protecting the couple’s honour. Jaggedmoon had not once laid a paw on her but was happy for everyone to think he had mated with such a good looking she-cat for his reputation and all that. Eventually they would have to run into each other, she would have to speak to him and she could already hear the bitterness in his voice. Then she would have to tell him that he was the father of her kits and not Jaggedmoon. The mixture of emotions that would explode within him at that moment were too much for her to imagine and she flopped onto her side and closed her eyes tightly, the whole situation giving her a headache. Despite Tidalhaunt thinking he was mad at her when he found out the truth she hoped he would step up and be a good father for she knew she had not fallen for a heartless tom. However, living a lie was making her anxious and it probably wasn’t good for the kits.
This bloody journey was not good for the kits either and her thoughts continued their endless cycle of no end and no beginning. One thing led to the next as thoughts whizzed out of her mind as quickly as they had entered. If she did not trust many of the cats within her own clan how on earth could she be expected to trust anyone from the other clans, Tidalhaunt being the exception. Each night would be restless as she would not be able to close her eyes fearing that when she did one of her kits would go missing. The good thing was she didn’t have to deal with any of that until they arrived but the downside of that was she would have to wait, holding her breath, for that moment when they would come. It would happen with little warning and it could even happen at the most inconvenient of times. Hopefully Starclan would be on her side.
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Post by LYNX ♥ on Jun 10, 2012 10:39:04 GMT -5
although the rain had stopped for the moment, the stress of daily living in celestialclan certainly did not. it was all piling up, and for a lass already drowning in her own problems, the rush of water consuming the territory paired with the clan's missing figureheads and her sister's rather untimely pregnancy and her mentor's deteriorating state was enough to overwhelm anycat. and panacea was so easily overwhelmed as it was!
feeling as though she was fighting a panic attack with every step, the pretty little female had learned in a matter of moments how to suck it up and deal with it. her clan was depending on her now, especially without hallowstar or falconflight around, it was up to she and fawndance to round them up and make the final move to vertigoclan. of course, no one had been looking forward to living under pyrestar's momentary reign, but her territory was the most liveable at the moment, and they had to make do. panaceaheart and her mentor had successfully made the move, though, despite the tides of anxiety that had threatened to envelop her in every moment, and thought she had probably become stronger because of it. fawndance, too, seemed to think so, as panaceaheart had taken up almost all of her mentors duties, and deep in her heart was almost anticipating the day she would become a full medicine cat.
"hauntedsky!" she called softly, spotted her sister's dappled pelt not far off in this unfamiliar dark forest. she saw her sister suffering a bit every day and it broke her heart, but there was little to be done. she was foolish to be mating with toms at any time, the young medicine cat figured, and cringed even at the thought of willingly doing so, especially after.... she crammed the thought away before it shattered all of her mental progress, and focused instead on the long-haired tortoiseshell before her, looking plump and worried. "h-how are you?" she murmured, flicking her tail sympathetically.
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Post by MiNTY♥ on Jun 12, 2012 10:39:49 GMT -5
Green eyes, blue skies, natural distasters when she cries A gentle, but familiar, call resulted in her ears twitching and she half opened one eye before raising her head to locate her sister. At times she was so soft spoken it was hard to catch her voice among the crowds but growing up with Panaceaheart had resulted in her always listening out for her quiet tones. Of course subconsciously she was always looking out for her little sister; anyone who tried to give her trouble should be prepared for a force coming their way. Overall she was glad her sister had found Fawndance, the medicine cat had helped her sister to find her footing and helped her confidence too. Hauntedsky knew her sister would always be quiet and nervous but having known her for so long she had been able to see how much she had improved. Most cats didn’t understand what she had been through and if anyone took advantage of her gentle nature Hauntedsky made sure they regretted it.
Nowadays their roles seemed to have switched around, she would never stop looking out for Panaceaheart but the younger medicine cat had been very helpful as Hauntedsky struggled to deal with her pregnancy. ”Just getting on with it and trying not to do anything that might hurt the little ones, yourself?” She responded, also aware that Panaceaheart had her own struggles as he helped her mentor to run the clan. Hauntedsky could easily have ranted on about how she was feeling but her sister would only worry about her and she wanted to keep any worrying on her behalf to a minimum. ”I just want to find a nest and settle in it for the next moon.” She purred, meanwhile picturing a nest packed with moss and feathers. ”The clans all being in one place is too busy and stressful for my liking and I would imagine I’m not the only one who feels this way. I hate putting my trust in strangers. It also means I need to face Tidalhaunt at some point and I am not looking forward to that conversation.” She added, being careful to lower her voice just in case anyone overheard their conversation. It wasn’t as though she could just hide away at the side of the group of cats; each day she was getting a little slower and soon enough everyone would know the reason why.
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Post by LYNX ♥ on Jun 13, 2012 20:10:29 GMT -5
it was really hard to see her sister like this, to think that she had made the choice to do this to herself... or something... it was all kind of confusing to panaceaheart, as she didn't know all the details to hauntedsky's love life, nor did she want to. she knew that the beautiful tortoiseshell was hiding from the truth, and panaceheart thought it would probably come out sooner or later, but she didn't want to tell hauntedsky that. who would it benefit? it would only cause more worry for her pregnant sister, whose belly was showing now more than ever. she looked silly all pump when she had always been so slender and svelte. the calico smiled at her sister, a quiet, pained smile when she turned around and noticed her meek presense. "I'm s-sorry, I know it must be rough." the medicine cat apprentice meowed, blinking her round blue-green gaze as it shifted over the other female's slightly rounded belly- it was well-concealed under her long, lush coat. panaceheart had spotted it quickly, but now anyone would be able to tell in spite of hauntedsky's thick pelt.
"I know the journey's gonna be kind of hard, but we're made of tough stuff. we've both been through worse so I know those kits will be alright." she giggled softly at her sister's next remark, and nodded with enthusiasm. "oh trust, me, I kn-know the feeling!" she purred, long feathery tail dancing behind her. "I just wish someone could step up and take celestialclan off of fawndance's paws! I know I'm n-not much h-help to her and she's, pardon me, she's too old for th-this!" panaceaheart sighed, big eyes helpless as she gazed into the alien pine trees, all too tall for her liking. suddenly, she turned back to meet hauntedsky's olivine eyes. "why don't y-you just, well, tell him? jaggedmoon is.... not the best choice either." panaceaheart didn't like the tom any more than she liked crowfood, he was no good. bad news. he was crude about she-cats, and he frightened her. he was scummy. in her opinion, her sister was better off just admitting to a half-clan litter than to that sleazy tom's kits. "then tidalhaunt's heart won't be broken and you can have the tom you really want. after all, we don't even know what's gonna happen to our clan.. or, or any clan for that matter! maybe it could work. and in the middle of all this c-chaos I doubt anyone would n-notice a little scandal like that," she teased lightly, looking at the pine-needle scattered forest floor.
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Post by MiNTY♥ on Jul 10, 2012 9:31:00 GMT -5
Green eyes, blue skies, natural distasters when she cries ”Honestly it’s my own fault for getting mixed up with the wrong tom cat.” She replied. Although this was not exactly what Hauntedsky had in mind when she fell for Tidalhaunt. In fact she was content with pushing others away and being the distant female that no tom could get to, mentally or physically. Now it was clear that she was no longer that female and a change had occurred within her. It had taught her that love led you to do crazy things and how it was capable of affecting every decision you made. She had always pushed others away because family was always the most important thing to her and it was still very important as she would do anything for Panaceaheart or Pounceflash. Taking a step back from her situation she saw it as a way of extending her family and not replacing them. Inside she dearly hoped that these kits would have both of their parents around to raise them into admirable felines. However, she and her sister had been raised by parents who adopted them and they turned out just fine. She rarely thought that there was a cat out there that was her real mother because she couldn’t imagine anybody else being better parents to her than Pounceflash and Winterspice. As long as they were brought into a loving family she knew that her kits would turn out to be just fine.
”I know they will be, but I just hope they are born when I have shelter to keep them safe. There are so many dangers out there but if we are in a large group I don’t think they will give us too much trouble.” She replied with a nod. ”And I can promise any predators that my kits will be no easy meal for them.” She added with a menacing growl. Panaceaheart understood how mad her sister could get if anyone messed with her family and Hauntedsky knew she would do anything to protect her babies even though she knew almost nothing about them, only that they exist and who their father is. ”You have been so brave trying to help her out, I’m sure she appreciates it. However, the other leaders are here now so we will just have to go along with what they tell us. Even if they have previously appeared cruel they will not just throw us out to fend for ourselves. I bet they want us to join their clans just to make them stronger, greedy assholes.” She replied, very certain of what she was saying. ”And nobody will want your special skills to go to waste, the clans will be practically begging for your intelligence.” It was all very confusing for her clan, but one way or another they would tag along with the others and refuse to be forgotten. Just because they did not have a leader to speak for them did not mean that her clan were weak. They had plenty of strong cats and two skilled medicine cats that any leader should desire to have as a part of their clan if they were smart.
At the mention of Tidalhaunt she grew quiet again and her features tightened. ”I really should, I guess I’m just scared that he has moved on or that he will be too busy to take any notice.” She thought aloud and sucked in her breath. Shaking the negative thoughts from her head she reminded herself of who she was and dragged herself up from the dirt she was lying in. ”You are right. He would be an idiot to reject me. I mean I have had to put up with sleaze bags chasing me all my life so it’s not as though I couldn’t find someone else and he probably knows that too.” She announced, suddenly gasping and quickly looking around her to check that nobody else had been listening.
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Post by LYNX ♥ on Jul 18, 2012 15:21:38 GMT -5
the patched female looked upon her sister fondly, as usual. so much stress and worry never seemed to diminish the other she-cat's radiance, and even with her over-rounded belly hauntedsky could probably woo any tom, but that all seemed like more trouble than it was worth. look where her beauty had gotten her! torn between males, kits in tow, stressed beyond any young lady should be! panaceheart sighed, and twitched her long, feathery tail. when she spoke, the calico sighed a again, and shook her head, "I dont believe that of tidalhaunt and I dont think you do either," she purred softly, her eyes glowing, "I wasn't involved, but your feelings about him have to be true or you wouldn't have ended up in this mess. hauntedsky I know you're a smart girl, and you couldn't just get mixed up like this." she meowed, speaking with confidence uncommon to her softspoken demeanor, but her words were spoken with passion that came from being raised under such a strange family structure, and though she loved her family dearly, she only wished her neices and nephews could have a real mother and father, never wondering about their true parents loving them or not, as she was sure both she and hauntedsky had often wondered of their real parents. these kits should know where their place was, and know they were loved by the ones who raised him. though she didn't know tidalhaunt, she knew her sister, and she knew her sister wouldn't fall for just any tom.
"with all these cats around, I doubt any harm could ever come to them. it won't be easy for them, but surely they will be safe. even the gruffest of tempestclan toms couldn't let harm come to innocent kits." she nodded, as if convincing herself as much as she was trying to convince the tortoiseshell, "well protected, for sure. and do you think fawndance or pounceflash would ever let them go uncared for even for a heartbeat? not a chance." the young medicine cat apprentice twitched an ear, as if the idea of these poor kits enduring any threat was completely unfounded.
hauntedsky quickly moved past that, though, and panaceheart was glad of it, since she was always felt inadequate about comforting others despite her medicine cat position, but found herself even more unhappy when talking about herself. "th-thanks," she murmured after her sister's compliment, shifting from paw to paw a bit when it came to that, but she nodded, "I fear for fawndance, only because of her age. obviously she's still functioning perfectly, but she should be able to enjoy her elder moons, shouldn't she? still I don't think there's a chance of her retiring before she... y'know... passes." panaceheart couldn't bring herself to think of her mentor dying, and leaving her alone as a full medicine cat. while she was more confident in her skills now than ever, she was far from feeling good enough to help a clan on her own. and where would she go? hauntedsky was right, the leaders wouldn't just let her go to waste, but she didn't like the idea of being passed around like a tool either. she shivered at the idea of leaving behind hauntedsky and pounceflash only because of her use as a medicine cat. "we need to stick together," she meowed abruptly to the other female, "I couldn't do anything without you there hauntedsky." she told her sister, and meant it passionately, meeting hauntedsky's olivine eyes with her own blueish gaze.
her heart skipped a beat when hauntedsky's attention returned to the father of her kittens, and panaceheart wished she could say the perfect thing to return her sister's confidence. "do you believe that of him? truly?" she asked finally, when a long moment of silence passed and she found it was her turn to back up her sister, "you loved him once, and surely he loved you back. I don't truly know the nature of the relationship, but it's worth a try, is it not? I know he's from tempestclan but... surely you couldn't fall for a heartless guy?" she grinned all at once when the beautiful tortoiseshell made her mind up, and she nodded her agreement. "I heard he'd one of the scouts for the leaders though... when he returns though, you ought to tell him."
//shall we wrap this up?
[/justify] |
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Post by MiNTY♥ on Jul 20, 2012 10:28:39 GMT -5
Green eyes, blue skies, natural distasters when she cries As it turned out she had been more focused upon how Panaceaheart was saying those words to her rather than what she was actually saying. Without being able to help it she always felt so proud when her sister seemed to lose her stutter, just like a mother would be proud of her kits and soon she would be going through that feeling a lot more. The only thing was it became a little awkward when the other female was still waiting for Hauntedsky to reply. Instead of coming up with an answer the dark mottled she-cat would be gazing proudly at her sibling. Catching hold of herself it took a moment of concentration for her to remember what they had been talking about and then she smiled. ”I guess I am just worried that he could have moved on by now, or anything could have happened really. I mean I just hope that he hasn’t changed and that he is still the same tom I used to know.” She replied, quickly recovering from spacing out.
”That may be true but that doesn’t mean that I trust any of them to be near my kits.” She replied quickly. Although the fact that Shard was gone was one less thing for her to worry about but she still couldn’t justify trusting a stranger. If anything happened to them she knew that she would live her whole life feeling responsible for it. ”Yes I know and I trust both of them greatly. I know they will have people around to care for them but even a journey is dangerous for us never mind them. I would like to apologise in advance for how anxious I am going to become after they are born.” At the same time she was really excited to have her kits be born. Secretly she hoped one of them would be a female, but no matter what their gender was they would all be loved the same. Despite the fact she would never have imagined herself being a mother before; she knew that she would be good at it. She felt so ready to bring up a litter of kits and she had a lot of love to give to them.
The stutter returned and her tail flicked gently over Panaceaheart’s pelt. ”Don’t say that. Fawndance knows that she has you to take over being medicine cat at any point so if she was ready to stop then I’m sure she would. Obviously I don’t know what it is like to be a medicine cat but I know she clearly loves her job and that she is very dedicated. Plus after spending so much time around sick cats she will have a great immune system. Try not to worry, she’s a tough cat.” She purred gently, trying to comfort her sister and minimise any doubts she had. Fawndance was getting older but she wasn’t that old and she was well respected so she would be well looked after.
A small tear formed in her eye and she tried to cover it with a smile. ”Don’t worry I am not going anywhere without you. I won’t leave you alone no matter what happens.” She replied, meeting her siblings gaze. She couldn’t imagine her life without her sister because no matter what happened they always had each other to lean on at the end of the day. ”I mean who else would I ask to babysit my kits?” She added with a grin. ”And I need you to be right as always, Tidalhaunt is good and I need to tell him as soon as possible”
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