here comes the rain again « [OPEN]

[Dawn]

* DREAMFEATHER

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I'm at war with the world
'Cause I ain't never gonna sell my soul

Even deputies must sleep, when darkness comes, and even the haunted have dreams of solace. Even after many sleepless nights, spent gazing into the emptiness of a darkened world, the body still will rest; it would be impossible for her insomnia to be constant, and if it was possible... Could she die from never sleeping for more than an instant? These thoughts worried her with their small teeth as she sank into her clean, unused nest at the base of the great tree. The last time she had slept in it, really slept, had been four days ago. She could have slept during the day, when the phantoms of her past did not dare to dance around her, but Dreamfeather was the deputy; she couldn't slack off on her duties for a few minutes of bliss. Sure, probably her leader would have wanted her to sleep so she wouldn't crash when out on patrol, but she couldn't allow herself to. She kept driving herself onward, trying to fulfill what she could not fulfill. It was a vicious cycle of her own kind of torture.

I keep it caged but I can't control it.

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She was running. There never seemed to be much in front of her; she was just running, and she couldn't stop herself. There was no future and no past because everything was an unchanging present. A wall of fire roared up in front of her; it was sudden and unexpected, and she was halted by the burning, passionate flames, licking at her silver fur. A young face drifted from the fire, wafting as smoke before her eyes. He was apprentice-aged and shared her crystal blue gaze. Another like-colored warrior, older and female, blinked emerald eyes at her. The two kin, those she could not recognize in her dream state, seemed to call to her as they joined pelts and melted into the fire, their eyes pleading for her to help. Dreamfeather wanted to go to them; but she was restrained, and could not run to their aid or turn back as the flames surged and grew higher and higher, threatening to overwhelm her. Distantly, she turned her fresh blue gaze down to her moonwashed fur, and found the black bengal stripes growing as fire washed over her, turning her black as ash and replacing the silver. Horror took her and emotions raged for dominance as she twisted under the assault of heat. She was falling into darkness, her pelt splintering as she split into many pieces, falling in slivers, free of the binds of her physical body.

No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream.

The feeling of assault on her pelt, trying to tear her into pieces, continued as she felt a falling sensation and jerked wildly, her azure lights snapping open. It was dark, probably not too long before dawn, and it was raining again. Her pelt clung to her body, soaked, and she shivered coldly, despite the heat she had experienced only moments ago. Dreamfeather stared into the darkness, putting to work her other senses as she gradually waited for her eyes to adjust, for the pupils to grow larger to take in light. Her mouth was dry, and she parted her jaws slightly in hopes that some of the drumming rain would fall into it. The air was cool and damp, and provided some relief as she listened; all she could hear, however, was the quiet snoozing of clanmates somewhere close by. She was still near the tree, and it was a safe homeplace, so she could be at ease. She must have rolled out of her nest, though, because as she sunk her claws downward she felt only damp earth. She could smell it, too; damp earth, cool, damp air. It was good, but she felt slightly chilled. As Dreamfeather gained sight again she began to move in the direction of her nest, finding it under the branches that protected from rainfall and settling into it. Here she could clean her fur and ponder the dream, all while waiting for others to wake up for the dawn patrol.

Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

After a long, rather lonely wait, the dawn light greeted her and she managed a soft smile toward the rising sun. Had her clanmates seen a true smile on the grim deputy's face, probably they would have been surprised, if not shocked. She so rarely smiled anymore; there was almost no reason to. It was easier being alone, when she could act upon impulse and not feel so cold and empty as usual around her clanmates. She hadn't always been like this; before her mother's betrayal and watching her wise, humorous father's death, she had laughed and been a dreamer as her name might suggest, ambitious with the future. She did not think that she could become a deputy, but she tried her hardest; and she had made it. But also, before those dreams and those hardships, she had wanted what now pushed her away; she had wanted a mate and to bear kits and to have a family. Really. Now, remembering her repulsion yesterday of Karma and Rift, and thinking of how politely she treated her clanmates, even her kin, she felt she would never achieve either of these. In truth, she really didn't have the time, energy, or want for them anymore. Her dream of becoming deputy, meant to come after a mate and kits, had overshadowed her want for a family and had consumed her. It was all she had time for anymore; and who would want to even befriend a female like herself? She was broken. Dreamfeather had few friends, outside of those that were not truly so; family, former apprentices, and those she associated with regularly because of her duties.

My secret side I keep hid under lock and key

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Cats began to wake with the morning light, into an optimistic but rather damp morning. Bird song could be heard from the trees, and Dreamfeather thought she heard one of the elders or older warriors grouching about the rain that had come just before the sun rose. It was good to be among these familiar sounds again. Perhaps a good day would follow a bad day and a horrific night filled with confusing dreams of Russet and Blazepaw? It was all she could do to look forward to the events of this day.
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[atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/28hmlp3.jpg] Typically exhausted from a full day's work of hunting patrols, regular patrols, and just overall duties, the tom had followed his retreating clan mates for a well deserved rest inside the great tree that made up the TempestClan camp. Things had been odd as of late, or that was one way to put it. While curious, the tom usually took no personal interest in the proceedings as long as they didn't clash with clan life, and so far, they had not. All he was worried about right now was getting to that thick branch that, as hollow as it was, served as his nest. A heavy groan escaped Badgerlight's lips as he settled down for what he presumed would be a restful night. He was one that sleeping came like a gift too. Moments after laying down, he could be out just like that; his breathing hard and his mind dead to the waking world. With a light, night-time breeze running through the openings in in the tree, that was just how his night began. The tom was lost in a realm, bland and dreamless. His large form remained stoic, and little moving as the prime darkness hours passed and morning was not far off the horizon. This was when, much too his surprise, Badgerlight awoke to a still moonlit sky. The tom's bright eyes blinked tiredly as he glanced around him. A loud yawn pushed itself from between his jaws and he smacked his lips dryly. Half-asleep and not far from closing this gap, the male was not aware enough to wonder what, if anything had woken him up. When a shuffling that was far from a sleepy cat erupted up from under him though, Badgerlight jerked his head cautiously and froze in place as he waited for the sound to come again. There! A black ear flicked as it caught the noise again, and curiously the tom looked around the dimly lit trunk. His glowing green gaze detected a vaguely outlined silhouette moving amongst the base of the massive plant. For a few moments, the answer eluded the weary cat of just who made their den right there, until it finally snapped into place. Dreamfeather! A small sigh of relieved air fled the tom, who also almost gave a shattering laugh that surely would have disturbed the other cats still in slumber. And he had thought there to be an intruder, how dumb of him. The tom chided himself mentally as he changed his position and curled his head close to him paws. Before dozing off once more, Badger found himself thinking what could have possibly had the deputy up at such an hour... Once again, his emerald eyes flickered open to greet a waking world, but this time a soft light could be seen filtering through the branches. In spite of the rain that drizzled down from an overcast sky just hours before, Badgerlight found itself mildly cheerful as he began to stretch his stiff bones in preparation for another day. It was then that the silver pelt of Dreamfeather caught itself at the very edge of his vision, and the occurrences of not too long ago returned to him. While he and the deputy were not altogether close, they were still clan mates. So as Badgerlight's stocky form clambered down from his bedding, the tom met the she-cat with lopsided smile and a rich, abysmal purr as he paused next to her. "Good morning Dreamfeather. Sleep well?" The tom quizzed, his glowing eyes looking at her with a stare that suggested more than just an innocent question.

[Dawn]

* DREAMFEATHER

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I'm at war with the world
'Cause I ain't never gonna sell my soul

The dawn patrol was not being led by her, and she had organized it the night before, so that was fine. She made sure that the entire patrol was sent out at the first hints of light, to patrol the borders in case any of Blackshard's 'friends' decided to drop by. That was high on her list of worries, although confusion about the dream of her kin was vying for top spot. Sure, she was always worried about the clan, but now that a rogue was part of it, and she was having dreams about Russetclaw... I'm just worried about Blackshard and Adderdance, that's all that there is to it. Shrugging off her worries, the silver bengal began to wash her fur, though she couldn't help but remember how it had turned to ashes in her dream, a black as deep as the pelt of the newcomer.

Soon, washing the dampness from her fur, Dreamfeather was lost in thought. It was odd- having woken early and not having slept for days before this, she should have been exhausted, eyes barely open, body aching from fatigue. Instead, she was almost in a state of hyperactivity. She was wide-awake, her thoughts constantly jumping, fighting over what was currently her top worry. Her tail twitched speedily back and forth, slapping the wet ground, and the only way she ached was to run and patrol and fight. Oh, she didn't appear so much like an energetic apprentice on the outside, she never did. If emotions were meant to be worn, she didn't have a pelt to keep her warm; everything was locked inside, well, almost everything. Her body language said she was up for a run or a spar, but it wasn't like she was going to invite her 'friends' to join her. Ha! What friends?

What Dreamfeather didn't think about was the few hours of darkness before dawn, when she had woken and moved a bit, silently or so she thought, disturbed by her dreams. It wasn't even a possibility in her mind that some cat might have been woken by her late-night dealings, and so she couldn't imagine the real reason Badgerlight stopped by her side. Perhaps he wanted to join or lead a patrol later in the day, or ask her a question about the newcomers. Who knows? Cats didn't approach her for many other reasons. It wasn't as if she appeared all that interested in making conversation with her clanmates. It wasn't that she didn't care; she cared fiercely. But emotions were so difficult to display to others, after a while...

Crystal blue lights showing her surprise in the early light, the deputy gazed back at the warrior, younger than her by ten moons, though hard working and respectable. Dreamfeather often recruited him to lead patrols. He was smiling, even offering a purr, but she frowned at this behavior. What could someone possibly want with being friendly to her? She was, unfortunately, so rarely friendly. Perhaps she could try it today; it might take her mind off her troubles. But where to begin, where to begin...? He greeted her politely, asked if she slept well. The silver bengal expected him to drop his green gaze then, as most did, but instead he continued to look at her, almost stare quizzically. Obviously he wanted something more from her than 'Yes, I slept fine, how did you sleep?' as would have been a normal, proper response.

"Er, why do you ask, Badgerlight?" She found herself grinning with a bit of amusement, out of character for her, as she turned the question back on him. "How did you sleep?" It was like the 'and how does that make YOU feel?' question, except even more satisfying. What an interesting way to start the day! It was definitely different; only just past dawn and already she'd had direct contact with a clan member.






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[atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/28hmlp3.jpg] All attention was given to the deputy as Badgerlight patiently awaited a reply, truth or not, to his somewhat innocent question. He was not an altogether fretful, emotional cat who had to share every clan mate's troubles, but he was not a hard cat either. He just knew where the line was whether intervening was correct or not. More often than not, the tom kept well enough to himself and let others figure their own. He preferred it that way, and he assumed they did as well. Yet this was the deputy, and her health and well-being coincided with that of the clan as a whole. That was what had caused the burly cat to act and question so. An intuitive gaze picked up on all the motion around him, including that of his selected company's. Badgerlight's luminescent sights trailed the passage of Dreamfeather's tail as it flicked restlessly in an almost hypnotic fashion from the left to the right, over and over. The right end of his jaw dropped in an off-sided frown as he speculated wordlessly to himself. With only a faint rustle, he sat himself down next to the bengal-clad she-cat and wrapped his black-tipped tail around his white-dipped paws. It was not entirely abnormal, the deputy's quietness and overall lack of conversation, Badgerlight knew. He was not an unsocial feline himself, but neither was he outwardly friendly to many. Dreamfeather just seemed to have these traits in excess, and remained to herself. Her duty was still performed well, so it was never necessary or desired for any to comment. As those blue eyes flickered to meet his own, Badgerlight put forth a mellowed-out, nearly invisible grin upon his features and emitted a low chuckle that did not appear to have fully left his chest. A witty response to a normal question - he liked it. With mock thoughtfulness the tom cocked his head to the side and looked up, the edge of his jaw jutting out as he set it. For that moment, his eyes had left hers for the first time since the conversation had started; his unwavering stare now off into space as he enacted deep concentration. "Hmm, me? What a difficult question." Badgerlight began, his humming voice stern as if the answer sincerely eluded him. "Well I must say that I slept fairly well. In spite of the fact of some late night kitten came bargin' in on my pretty dreams." With ease the tom's tone had slipped into that of one of false outrage at the wrong done against him. Once again though it began slipping into a note of casual. "Which leads me back to the question - how did you sleep last night, sly Dreamfeather?" (ehhh, bad post)

[Dawn]

* DREAMFEATHER

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I'm at war with the world
'Cause I ain't never gonna sell my soul

She had been caught off guard. Usually she didn't break face in the slightest, not even to twitch a whisker, but now she had shown genuine emotion. It was an off day; hell, more like the whole moon had been off. Blackshard. He had met her in the forest on his way to their clan, had been given his new name, had been accepted into Tempestclan. Adderdance. She was Blackshard's mate, and until now, their prisoner; one that she had spent guarding endlessly since her arrival. Voidstar. He seemed to expect something of his kin, Blackshard; she would back him up all the way, of course, even if this whole thing crashed and burned she would remain loyal. Russet and Blazepaw... well, they were dead. But lately, the little she had been sleeping, her dreams were filled with them. Can seeing Russet up in flames have to do with Shard's arrival? And now, well, Badgerlight was asking questions and she was actually bothering to respond, more of a response than a grunt or a yes or no. It was miraculous that a clanmate was speaking directly to her and about something not clan-related, though she suspected it was only because she was the deputy. But her response was also worth mention; and the two facial expressions, perhaps three if confusion registered, were unheard of. Cold as stone and made of the same stuff, that's what they said of her.

Badgerlight was good at picking up on things; his glinting green eyes lingered on her tail, studied her body language, and as soon as the bengal saw him looking she stilled completely. He was almost as good as she was at these sorts of things; and probably would have been better, had he been practicing being a functional mute since, well... probably since she was given her warrior name. Dreamfeather wasn't accustomed to others knowing how she felt unless that emotion was anger; she had certainly let her frustration with Flamestripe be known the day before, when he had paraded around her. And all in front of the rogue, too... It hadn't been her proudest moment. This probably wasn't either, as she watched Badgerlight cock his head to the side, but she had to admit, it was more fun than sitting alone with her thoughts the morning over.

What a difficult question. She glanced back at him as he spoke, blue lights glinting faintly in humor. The deputy couldn't help but snort at being called a kitten, being older than he, but still he did act far more intelligent than some of the lazy warriors around camp, so she had to give him credit. And anyway, he had gone through enough trouble, so she may as well give him an answer. What was with Dreamfeather and being so indirect when things concerned herself? "A bit poorly, interrogative Badgerlight. I was having a few bad dreams, that's all." She responded finally, lightening nightmares to bad dreams. Really, wasn't sleeping a few hours better than not sleeping at all?



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