a new kind of patience; [flamingarrow's lives]

[lily ♫]

it was new, everything, each experience, each scent, each day, everything, since the day they left their old home. vertigoclan was truly no more, yet at the same time, it had evolved into something else entirely timberclan. it was a beautiful name, and their new home was simply so - beautiful. flamingarrow had never been so proud. and, now, as she left the camp with arcticlight by her side, she thought of what was coming. her lives. she was going to be leader of timberclan. they traveled toward the mountains, slipping into a small cave entrance, the stalagmites and stalagtites surrounding them on all sides. the moisture increased around them until they reached a room filled with an icy pool. starclan's maw, they all called it, and flamingarrow looked nervously to her medicine cat before nodding, and she approached the pool, took a lap of water from it, and quickly fell into a dream-filled sleep.

when her eyes flicked open, her breath was released in a quick, quiet gasp. "dear..starclan." she breathed, as her emerald eyes moved back and forth, capturing the glittering trees and shadowy forms of cats all around her. the clearing was filled with cats and clanmates she vaguely remembered that had died many, many moons ago when she was either a kit or young apprentice. but then, her breath caught, and tears welled up in her eyes as she spotted familiar faces - her heart stopped. a warm smile appeared on the face of a cat she had never thought she would see again. with her solemnity and her abrupt bobtail twitching, flamingarrow raced over to her former mentor, confidant, and leader. she pressed her face into lynxstar's shoulder, her tears shedding finally, and she laughed. "straighten up, flamingarrow." was her light rebuke, and flamingarrow stepped back, nodding quickly and still smiling slightly.

with a sniff, she shook herself lightly and came to rest in a sitting position, her tail wrapped around her front paws, but the tip twitching incessatntly. "i'm ready." she murmured, dipping her head down neatly, her excitement growing inside. what would it be like? the pain? the joy? her thoughts raced faster than she could comprehend, and her stomach twisted in knots, but as she looked up with her emerald eyes, a bright set of amber eyes met her, the same smile she possessed reflected upon the of the cat standing before her. scorchface, a slender calico with bright ginger markings and an obsidian mask across her face, flamingarrow's mother, stood before her.

stepping forward, she grew serious, touching her nose first to her daughter's own and then to the top of her daughter's head. "with this life i give you energy." her mother began, and flamingarrow trembled, each of her muscles straining against the flow of adrenaline that rushed through her body. she felt as if she could travel to the old territory and back ten times, without stopping to rest. "use it well to guard your clan's borders and to fight for everything you believe in, love." was the rest of her mother's whisper. as she stepped back, flamingarrow could barely keep her eyes open - despite her first life's intention, she felt exhausted, and her heart sung bittersweetly as her mother walked back to join lynxstar. "m-mom, i'm sorry i couldn't protect you!" she called to her, clenching her jaw to hold in her emotions.

the next figure that approached was the reddest pelted tom she'd ever seen in her life, and her smile returned as she looked up into the same set of emerald eyes she possessed. "dad." flamingarrow murmured, holding back a smile. he approached with an ornery light in his eyes, witholding a smile and instead pressing his nose to flamingarrow's head. "dear, with this life, i give you pride." and flamingarrow was sent on another journey - the flickerings of memories of her when she was but a young kit, flashing before her eyes, quickly, ending in a vision of bright red, and the agony she felt was enough to make her let out a cry. but then she saw herself growing up again, clearer, but after she had been orphaned. a younger lynxstar stood, her mouth moving silently, forming the words that explained battle moves and hunting techniques, for no sound came with these visions except for the quiet breathing of her father. "use it well to make each and every kit, apprentice, warrior, queen, and elder know that they belong in timberclan, and do not let them forget those that came before them." he warned, his voice stern as he pulled back. "we're so proud of you, flamingarrow." he whispered, before following where his mate had gone, and stood next to scorchface, quickly pressing his nose to hers before refocusing on the ceremony.

the next figure was tabby-marked, and his gaze made flamingarrow's heart skip a beat. her muscles were tensed, her heartbeat thrumming, and she silently cursed herself as chasmriver approached. "hey lady." he whispered, pressing his nose to the top of her head. she'd forgotten what his voice sounded like, and she couldn't help but smile. "with this life i give you courage. use it well to stand up for your clan and fight for your life as well as your clanmates'." it burned, the raw force she felt flowing through her body. in her mind, foxes, bears, badgers, any foe could face her, and she would never feel fear. the darkness around her was a comfort, she would fight off and ward off any dangers that dare meet her or her clan, and just like that, the life ebbed away, sinking into her own lifeforce. as the tabby tom backed away, his mischevious smile appeared upon his maw, and he winked. "take care of those good ol' vertigoclan girls, alright? just because they're timberclan now doesn't mean anything." he drawled, cracking a smile at her that she couldn't help but return. "oh, and that garnet guy seems pretty nice." her face flushed, and she looked away from his amber gaze as he went to stand in ranks with her parents.

the next giver was a miniature version of herself, his bright tabby pelt the color of fire and his eyes as green as her own. her own son, heatpaw, bounded toward her, and she smiled to greet him. "hi." she meowed, touching noses with him before bending her head down for him to touch his nose to her head. "with this life, i give you the gift of protection. may you always be able to protect your values and those who depend on you." he replied, as she once more felt the pain of losing her kits, not faced with her inability to protect them, but with how hard she tried to do so. "h-heatpaw, i should have warned you, i-" she thought back to the windy day that her son had died on. 'he should have known better than to be playing so close to the crevice with the winds so bad that day.' she thought, but then frowned deeply. no, i should have warned him. it's my fault he died.' the pain from this life stayed, aching in her heart as she watched her son dance away on his paws, tail flicking behind him.

a gray-shrouded black tom was the next to appear, his face happier than it had ever been when he had been alive. her nephew, gloomshroud, stood before her, his pale green eyes met her vibrant ones. "don't worry about him, flamingarrow. he's happy here, despite the fact." was his greeting before he got to business. his nose pressed to the top of her head, and he spoke again. "with this life i give you compassion." and she felt a whole range of emotions burning into herself. pain, agony, betrayal, and yet, she also felt pity, forgiveness, and longing. it was a well-rounded life, though still painful, but it was more tolerable than some of them.

her emerald eyes rose to meet those of an entirely black she-cat, her blue eyes as pretty as the day they had met. abyssbird walked with grace and fludity, the pains she had endured later in her life no longer there, and flamingarrow couldn't help but smile at her once friend. the other she-cat touched noses with her head before speaking. "with this life, i give you love. may you always keep those who matter close to your heart." she murmured quietly, and flamingarrow hissed from the torturous agony. emotions swept through her like lightning striking over and over again - the exhilaration of a first crush, the feeling of loss and despair she had felt when separated from her clan, how strongly she had felt toward each of these cats came rushing back, nearly overcoming her feelings of reality - her strong, admiration and respect for garnetbone - was it love? perhaps. as she peeked her eyes open, she spied abyssbird returning to her ranks, and the goofy grin of another tom.

his body was patched with white and tabby, his green eyes full of pride and respect for her, and flamingarrow chuckled. "hello, northy." the ginger tabby uttered quietly, and he nodded before touching his nose to her brow. "with this life i give you the gift of mentoring." he whispered, pulling away from her and looking her straight in the eyes. "may every timberclan apprentice be taught the values of their clan and how to fight to protect and feed it, as long as they live." northwind drawled before winking at her. it was a strange life, with wisdom and thoughtfulness rushing through her, flickers of battle moves and hunting techniques raced through her mind, as well as many errors that apprentices had made as well as how to correct them. she shook her head, chuckling, before her eyes met lynxstar's once more.

she exhaled sharply before sucking it back in. "here we are at last." lynxstar murmured quietly, her bobtail thumping against herself in a comical fashion. lynxstar bowed her head down to touch noses with her former apprentice, and flamingarrow grinned sheepishly as her former mentor raised her head to touch her nose to her head. "with this life i give you patience. may you treat every infraction of the warrior code with it, as well as justice." the other she-cat meowed softly, pulling away. "i have faith in you, dear." flamingarrow nodded, feeling as though she could wait a thousand years, especially for this moment to end. but it was gone, just like that, and lynxstar was leaving - wait! her new name, wasn't she forgetting something? she paused for a moment, contemplating each life silently. energy, one, pride, two, courage, protection, compassion, three, four, five, love, mentoring, patience - but that was only eight!

before she could cry out, the eight cats standing before her vanished, and flamingarrow screeched in shock. no! she hadn't memorized their faces, their voices, the way they had looked at her! she felt as though she was falling, and when she arrived to her destination, the world seemed to spin. the forest all around her was dark. something was wrong, incredibly so! her breath came quickly in shocked pants, her emerald eyes darting back and forth before landing on something out of a nightmare. knife.

his albino body paired with those blood-red eyes made her skin crawl as if it were alive with maggots. she didn't dare shudder - the slightest tremble would be enough for him to destroy her! she was stronger now, much so, and he could do nothing to change it. but no, he was approaching her, his stench that of carrion. her nostrils flared, her eyes narrowed, it was all she could do not to spit! he reached forward, as if trying to touch his nose to her head! no! her eyes widened in shock, in fear - was this really happening? she pulled back and he chuckled, stepping forward quickly and smashing his nose against her skull. tears welled up in her eyes. "with this 'life'" he stressed so mockingly. "i give you loyalty." he purred in a way that made her want to vomit. "may your loyalties forever lie with your one, true clan." knife pulled away, and flamingarrow shuddered with absolute disgust. "leave me alone." she spat, closing her eyes tightly, as his laughter filled her ears.

when her eyes reopened, she was back in the star-filled forest, lynxstar looking at her sorrowfully. "i hail you by your new name, flamingstar. your old life is no more. you have now received the nine lives of a leader, and starclan grants you the guardianship of timberclan. defend it well; care for young and old; honor your ancestors and the traditions of the warrior code; live each life with pride and dignity." lynxstar dipped her head in respect, turning around to return to the lineup of cats. "flamingstar! flamingstar!" they chanted, and flamingstar looked at them, in shock, her eyes haunted, and she awoke, sweating and panting rapidly.

"arcticlight, we're leaving." she cried suddenly, rising to her feet and nearly falling down in the process. her feet carried her drunkenly to the exit, her steps shaky as her medicine cat followed her. "what's wrong? f-flamingstar?" she asked, and flamingstar simply kept on moving until they had returned to the egde of timberclan territory. the she-cat turned to her suddenly, her emerald eyes glassy with emotion. "i think i was given a false life." she whispered breathlessly before breaking into tears.