so...

[Swift ✱]

ok. so i have no muse and my activity is nearing zero. there's one reason behind this.
someone close to my family died. not just my family; everyone around here knew her.
i just feel so depressed. she was involved in everything - in a good way - and was always helpful, always on the go. she was friends with everyone. the problem really was that she wouldn't stop doing things for eveyone. even when they told her that she should rest, she kept driving around and doing what she always did. even up to a few weeks ago she was still up and going. then it all went downhill rapidly. she went into a coma last weekend then woke up during the week. on sunday we got new that she had died. just like that. she played a signifgant part in the little communtity around here. it almost feels like everything's shutting down now she's dead.
it's worse for her four children. the oldest is just a bit younger than me. the youngest has only just started primary school. he's four years old, for gods sake! he's the same age as my little sister. and his mother is dead. i feel terrible for her husband and kids.
i just can't imagine what it'd be like for that to happen to me. the worst things happen to the nicest people. it's terrible for that family. it's so sad.

yeah, so, i'm not sure why i just wrote that. i just needed to say something to someone. anyone. and if my posts are short and crappy, this is why.

[MiNTY♥]

That's ok swift, we are all here for each other.

After I finished reading that I instantly felt so terrible for her children, I can't even imagine what they must be going through and it's disgusting that people have to experience things like that. I'm sure your whole community must be suffering from it, but from what you have described she sounds like an amazing person and I'm sure she wouldn't have changed anything for the world. She seems to have lived a wonderful life and I'm just sorry that everyone is taking an emotional blow from her passing.

[Dawn]

That just sounds really... terrible. That's all I can think to say about it, it's very terrible. And with her children and everything... Of course no one is going to blame you for posts, that you're even around and posting is great. I obviously don't want you to 'get over her' but I do hope that with time your community will heal up a bit, even if it will never be the same.

Get better, m'Swifty, but take the time that you need to mourn for her.

[Swift ✱]

<3 Thanks guys.


i don't mean to just load this on you all, so if you want, stop reading. i don't mind, i just want to put it down somewhere.

a few days ago i got sick and it's serious enough, so i don't know what'll happen. i've had it before and last time i ended up in hospital and it was quite bad, i suppose you could say. i'm in pain and taking strong antibiotics. it's not good.

overnight, my grandmother fell ill and she's in hospital now. it's only a few months after my grandfather died and she's the only grandparent i have left. she's not old and is generally very healthy, so this is a shock for all of us. As far as we could see, she was fine when she came over on Tuesday, then all of a sudden i hear she's in hospital. That's two days and she's suddenly ill. it's all gone downhill in the past few days.

When I go back to school I'll have a tonne of catching-up to do because I've been out all week. That means not only will I have very little muse, but my activity will have fallen. I'll try my best to be on, but I can't guarantee anything, for anyone.


I know it's not very relevant to ye, but that's now the reason for my non-posting.

[lily ♫]

When my grandma died in the first few days of December in 2005, it was devastating. It was the first real death I ever had to deal with. Her husband dealt with it poorly, but he slowly recovered and began to test the new freedom he had. In a few months, he was in the nursing home part of the hospital, and in a few more he was dead.

It's not uncommon for them to go right after one another, especially if they were close (and who wouldn't be after over sixty years?).

We'll welcome you right back with open arms and sympathetic smiles on our faces, swift. <3

[Ice]

Well, I know what it's like to lose someone close. We have a lot of deaths in my family. Most as recent as last year. I am usually very close to the deceased person. Even my great great aunt, whom had alzheimers yet always remembered me. I am a good listener, if not so much a writer, so anyone can talk to me. •-•'
Anyhow, while you never get over the death of a loved one, you can always remember the good times. Sometimes writing poetry helps.




To stand in a fire.
Yet to no scream out in pain.
Is strength in itself.